I need to get creative for this...

Greetings from Gainesville..lol yep, still here.

First off, I am sorry that I stink at keeping in touch(I’ve always been bad at it, but I hope this blog will change that). I really do miss all of you and the community we had in Theta Alpha. I have to agree with Ellie, it feels like a million years ago.

My life…. Well, it certainly has not gone to my plan, but maybe that’s for the best. I know God has a purpose for me being here and working in a preschool but I def. still struggle with it. I still want to be an OT, and over the past year and a half, I have learned a lot of lessons about the real world, responsibility, what I do and don’t want in life and how important community truly is. So here it is... The good, the bad, the ugly…

Family…Good. It’s been a really hard struggle to be in the same house, esp after being on my own. Having almost a curfew and trying to balance time between everyone in my life. I do love my family, and have gotten closer to them but boy its hard sometimes to stay sane

Friends…Not like my Theta Alpha Loves, but I am building a community of close friends that helps me keep sane at times and to remember how faithful God is and that he has a purpose for all of this. Specifically my friend Lindsey J I am also looking at possibly joining a different church and finding a community outside of grace (where I’ve been since 7th grade) where I am challenged more, and can give more and am possibly checking out Anthem church.

So, I guess that leads to God. It’s definitely been a rollercoaster ride full of ups and downs and twist. I pulled away when I graduated, feeling like a failure for not going to grad school, moving back home, working at a preschool and still occasionally wrestle with that feeling. And I think it contributed to how I pulled away from some of you. I didn’t want to hang around Theta Alpha as the alumni that wouldn’t leave and wasn’t in grad school and I didn’t want you guys to see me like that. And that was my loss. I also should have pulling God closer rather than pushing him away and putting up the front that everything was ok and I was still confident. But I am realizing there is a purpose. I have gotten to spend time with family (even if they drive me crazy sometimes) , gotten to develop a relationship with my middle school youth girls, build a stronger relationship with Tanner, and meet some new friends and learn that while it may not be my plan, God has the better one anyway. So if I am called away to another city for grad school or anything else, this time wasn’t wasted.

Work… I still want to be an OT, even if my boss doesn’t lol. She has promoted me to a lead teacher and hopes i will stay. I have my own class of 2 year olds, wow, its actually kinda cool and def a challenge because now I have lesson plans, and standards to meet and to provide a fun but successful learning environment. I still want OT. I am being open to the possibility that God could call me to teach, but will keep pushing forward to OT until he slams the door in my face lol. I want to help people. I want to make a difference and OT and Teaching both accomplish that. Side note, I miss me time. (I’ve been working 7:30-5:30 every day this past week and 8:30-5:30 before that. Add that to being at home or using the last few hrs before bed to hang with tanner or friends or youth or family. Luckily with the position change, my schedule is changing soon.

Last but not least…Tanner. A year and a half and going strong. He knows me better than

anyone, can make me smile or seriously drive me crazy or keep me sane. Calls me out when I need it, comforts and listens and sees right through me even when I don’t want him to. We have our share of fights (some of them knock out drag out ,not literally but we are both stubborn)but we always apologize or stay to work it out. He brings out the kid in me and while most people think im the more mature one, sometimes I think they are wrong. Because the side he doesn’t show most people is more mature than I am. So I can’t complain lol. He wasn’t what I expected God to give me either (hmmm, a pattern maybe?)

Anyways if you didn’t know this about me, I’m stubborn but I’m glad God is more stubborn that I am.

Prayer Request:

~Mom. Her mother passed away a couple weeks ago

~My youth girls.

~Me. That I would build a stronger community and make a difference. To stay positive and grow closer to God and be open to and excited for his direction. It took him pulling me off my own course to stop and realize I need to follow him not the other way around and yet I still try and grab the wheel lol. I’m stubborn but luckily HE is more stubborn than I am

In closing…. Merry Christmas!!! And Post please, if I can do it, u can :P